Who’s Your Best Friend?
Ever since I became a Christian over 30 years ago I have had occasion to think about this question. As I have thought about my singleness and the possibility of marriage, I have thought about it even more. Having revisited my alma mater in the last few days, and having graduated from my undergrad 30 years ago, it made me reflect on a lot of things, this area being one of them. The last couple of days in particular have really focused my attention, with a close friend having just got married, and them exiting from my life as a result. It is odd that in many ways, when people get married they become the most anti-social people in the world. The initial days of one’s marriage make this somewhat understandable, even though some people remain this way, and their spouses are the extent of their “social” life at any meaningful level.
However, my question really aims to go much deeper than this, and I am more surprised at myself that it has taken me so long to crystalize my thoughts on this subject. Many Christians say that one’s spouse must be their best friend-and they claim this for themselves, and in many ways as a clue to why they are still together. I understand what they are getting at. Romantic emotional commitment to someone other than one’s spouse is often the first step of infidelity. However, I do believe that what the scriptures teach also guards against this evil. I believe that the LORD of the covenant is asking us to, among other things, make Him our best friend. The LORD will not be satisfied unless we are wholly committed to Him with our whole persons-including our emotional life.
When Eve presented the forbidden fruit to Adam-who was his best friend? When Job’s wife told him to curse his God-who was his best friend? When Caleb and Joshua came back from spying out the land-who was their best friend? When Rahab hid the spies and sent them away safely-who was her best friend? When Ruth followed Naomi-who was Ruth’s friend? No doubt Orpah was also Naomi’s friend-but this was not enough for her to follow. When Samson divulged the secret of his strength-who was his best friend? When he finally came to his senses-who was finally his best friend? When Jesus cried out “My God My God, why have you forsaken me!” Who was His best friend? When He ascended to the Father-who was still His best friend? When a family member or friend finds out that their spouse has cheated on them and remains unrepentant-who is their best friend?